Well...I am here in town following my heart and after all that travelling I feel like a fool for being here. Nothing went as I had planned it in my head. I thought it would be a nice vacation and now that I'm here my boyfriend wouldn't make an effort to spend time with me. Instead, it was spent with days of excuses. It doesn't take energy for a phone call and all I'm asking for is time! The break up was ugly. It was a big ugly monster. Unfortunately, I let my anger burst out of me. Since he was not here in person as he never is--I was left to get things off my chest via text. It was not good. My heart is broken because he led me to believe that he would be here for me but he is here for everyone else but me. If you want someone to be your wife, you should be able to do anything for them. Instead, I felt like an inconvenience to him. He says he was preparing for our evening but he keep saying that over and over and I wasn't seeing any actions. He took the day off and said we would spend it together. He was running "errands" all damn day (yea right). Then claimed he was "tired". And we were suppose to use this trip to look for places but he never has any time for me. So he got his feelings hurt. I really think he should man up though because I'm sure people have said worse to him.

I still love him and I can't help that because he has been a part of my life for 2 years. He was my first serious boyfriend. (I am a late bloomer.) Day by day it will get easier. There are alot of things I learned from this relationship:

1. He can't make empty promises.
2. He has to be able to be there for me emotionally/physically.
3. Treat me like a princess not second class mistress.
4. Can't be too sensitive.
5. Love me for being me.
6. When I come see you, I should be top priority.
7. We should share the same brain wavelengths.
8. Have the same morals and values.
9. Comunicate our needs clearly and concisely.